Well, it is an herculean task to win a fight with a girl, whether it’s on the phone, or sitting against each other in a room, or sitting at your coffee table, or at your bar – wherever it is. Now why is it so tough? Here is why:
1- You care about her.
2- She is not some guy whose nose you can break or arm you can twist.
3- She is not some guy who you can tell how big an idiot he is being or how illogical his points are.
4- You have to control your emotions as well as your mind at the same time.
5- If she goes way out of line, you can’t call her names.
6- If she is making up facts, you can’t just stop her or do 2 or 3.
So how do you win a fight? Here is how:
Just close your mouth, and listen as closely as you can. Let her complete the entire thing, so you can carefully choose your points, and understand what she actually wants to say separating it from her blahblah (talks which show how disappointed she is/ how much embarrassed she was/ how much angry she is). When you would do that, you’ll realize that she took 15 minutes to complete what could have just taken one sentence to be said.
2) Don’t ever clash.
3) Once she is over, take the points down.
Once she is over complaining or whining. Your sentence should start with: So what you meant to say is, you have the following problems, (and one by one, in points, list down all the problems from her words). When you will do that, she’d be confused. The basic reasons behind this:
- She had never actually formed her points, before she came spilling out of her mouth.
- She never expected this, all she expected was winning and you shamefully apologizing.
4) Once she is confused, gradually put her down.
This would give you enough confidence, time and points to easily put her down in front of you and show how idiotic her whining was. The conclusion would be that out of 100 %, only 20 % of what she complained about was true and plausible. You can show this to her and lecture her on how she should behave the next time she has any problem. Tell her that she needs to first think from your point of view.
Now, this is a great way of showing how you can control things, and gradually such a habit can make you win every fight. You win fights not because you are smart, but because you kept your calm and didn’t become all chaotic. Talking about manners and proper way of communication is a sign of dignity and respect.